"abandon all shame" god i wish i fucking did
maybe my time is better spent writing rpf smut than, idk, downloading linux distros for a hypothetical future project? i don't know what i'm doing rn but i guess i've abandoned all pretense of doing anything productive because i haven't created anything of substance in 2-3 days and my sleep schedule has been found dead in a ditch.
wait actually i retract the first half of that statement. i literally just drew something on my ipad for the first time in what feels like weeks today & i just couldn't remember because i'm living on a 30-hour schedule now
surely going to sleep and waking up at completely fucked up times is not having any detrimental effects on my mental and physical health whatsoever. surely sitting in my chair all day & only moving my body when i need to occasionally leave my room or leave the house is a very healthy lifestyle. surely ranting about these problems that i am capable of fixing is all i need to do to fix them
here comes the part of me that's never satisfied and keeps raising the bar until i stop trying because my standards are impossible to meet in my current state but i have no backup plans when i do hit my lowest point (which is right now). what's the point of installing linux on my desktop if i'm just going to end up using my windows laptop even more instead?
ok it's gonna take a while for neocities to update the css but i think i fixed my shit so now the images in my interests page should display as intended and my yapping should be more readable soon enough. i guess it feels nice to pick myself up with some forward progress every day, even if i'm refusing to address the elephant in the room...
yeah i might be a fucking idiot i have no idea how this css shit works lmao
also doing work on my laptop while still sitting on my chair is making my back hurt. i am very good at making decisions